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Wednesday, August 17th, 2005

Subject:99 non lies.
Time:2:51 am.
Mood: blah.

1. i am a strong believer in time healing all
2. when i feel the most lost i usually find myself on the rooftop
3. pants shopping is my most depressing activity
4. i don't really like driving but once in a while i get in the mood
5. i like listening to songs in repeat mode
6. my favorite color is green
7. i've learned that the things you believe that you can't live without you probably can
8. when i fall in love it's unconditional
9. i feel loved when: people make me cds, play with my hair, and hold my hand
10. i'm a very jealous person
11. sex buddies are lame and never work out unless they are two week relationships
12. i'm not shallow
13. i love being in the water
14. i am the world's biggest procrastinator
15. i don't ever think i will fall in love again
16. i don't believe in god but i believe in karma
17. i don't think before i speak most of the time
18. i hate that i am clingy
19. i miss my dad but i don't do anything about it
20. sometimes i hurt people on purpose
21. i love the rain and the way it smells just after it stops
22. i find myself with stalker tendencies (not on purpose of course)
23. the people i care most about i hold them to a higher standard
24. i cry too much and consider myself a crybaby
25. my heart has been broken twice by the same person
26. i'm not scared to die
27. when i'm in a really good mood i usually sing and make up my own lyrics
28. i hate it the most when i disappoint myself
29. i don’t consider weed a drug
30. i have never bought weed
31. i never plan to either
32. i hate fake people A LOT
33. i don’t consider myself a druggie or an alcoholic even though my family would beg to differ
34. i am use to getting my way
35. i think underwear is overrated
36. i bite my nails a lot
37. my family really does hate me
38. the first pet i ever had was a white rabbit
39. it froze to death
40. i hate a lot of people
41. i like to recycle
42. having candles lit during sex makes me feel like it's a porn video
43. i've always wanted a pea coat
44. i don’t like making the first move kissing wise unless i’ve known the person for a while or if i’m drunk
45. i don't regret anything i've done
46. souly because i can only learn from my mistakes
47. kaden.miles.colby.jake (favorite boy names in order)
48. i want to go to college in san diego
49. i never had a treehouse
50. i love quotes
51. i remember the most useless information
52. i freak with one arm in the air
53. spontaneity makes me so happy
54. i want another dawson leery (i recently lost mine)
55. i have promised myself that i am done with settling
56. i have a worst memory
57. i also have a best memory
58. i want to be less jaded about love and relationships
59. i like the a’s
60. rock music is my favorite
61. my mom is my anti-role model, much of my life’s decisions are decided with the key concept that i am not going to end up like her (a bitter unhappy woman)
62. i love my mom
63. my away messages never have capital letters in it unless the whole message is in caps
64. i like getting text messages
65. jean and tank top weather is my favorite type of weather
66. i cheat, but i really don’t want to anymore
67. turn ons: tall, skinny and pelvic lines
68. i like going out to eat for breakfast/lunch/dinner
69. i’m not as outgoing as i use to be, but still consider myself an outgoing person
70. i always fall for the wrong boys, but i’m getting better
71. i can keep secrets
72. i don’t really like hugging girls
73. i wish i were taller by three inches
74. i’m too old for drama, don’t you think?
75. i don’t believe in love at first sight
76. i’ll never be able to decide between soup or salad
77. i love cuddling naked
78. i have a lot of freedom and I abuse it
79. i hate when people think I’m bratty unless I’m acting bratty on purpose
80. i lie a lot to my mom
81. i’m addicted to aim
82. i hate the mind games you have to play to be in a relationship
83. summer nights laying out makes me happy
84. two foods i don’t think i could ever get sick of: turkey sandwiches and chicken soup
85. i can’t wait to start my new life (college and not moraga)
86. i can eat tomatoes like you can eat apples
87. my fantasy is to make out in the rain.
88. i already did it
89. my toilet bubbles
90. i hate when people get into relationships and suddenly nothing else in their life matters except that relationship
91. i love meeting new people, but not necessarily becoming/staying friends
92. i won’t admit it but i like being scared in scary movies
93. i value my relationships with males greater than those with females because of the non existent relationship i’ve had with my dad
94. i want to do two more types of drugs and then i’m done
95. i like when you can sit with someone, do nothing at all, and for it still to be fun
96. i’m scared of the build a bear store because of the barrels full of non stuffed bear skins
97. i create conflict on purpose in relationships
98. i’ve learned a lot about myself this summer
99. 36085 asquith place is better than 15 hardie drive

Nothing ever becomes real till it is experienced.—John KeatsCollapse )

12 <3|share your thoughts...

Thursday, January 13th, 2005

Subject:it was my birthday.
Time:7:25 pm.
Mood: cold.

Happiness is anyone and anything at all, that's loved by you.Collapse )
19 <3|share your thoughts...

Wednesday, December 29th, 2004

Time:12:21 pm.
Mood: confused.
the worst part of leaving for a month is to miss your bed, bathroom, kitty, computer, phone, tv and human contact.

the month hasn't started. ha.
QUESTION TO EVERYONE::: is love suppose to be enough? is it the answer to feeling empty?Collapse )
6 <3|share your thoughts...

Sunday, December 12th, 2004

Time:11:25 pm.
Mood: mellow.

so, i know i havn't updated in a while. i've been grounded until the end of time. it's horrible. i'm a screw up. it sucks that people need sleep. oh well. maybe one day it will all be forgotten.

i miss my summer and my swim team so much.

i can't read the map, no ones ever seen the path.Collapse )

10 <3|share your thoughts...

Wednesday, December 1st, 2004

Subject:blow... :) except i HATE jay :(
Time:10:37 pm.
Mood: optimistic.

blow is love
brought to you by the isLove Generator
6 <3|share your thoughts...

Monday, November 29th, 2004

Time:12:33 am.
i stole this from caitlin rebecca because i thought it was fun! :)



Your Emo Boy Fantasy (P.L.Z.)
Full Name
His name: Mark
You met at: at the train station when he asked you the time
You go on a date to: To the Airport: he’ll drive you there without telling you where you’re going, Once you’re there he’ll lay a blanket out on the roof of his car and the two of you will climb up there and lie talking over pedro the lion playing softly in the background.
He calls you: Tiger
He secretly wants to: buy you a puppy dog to keep you safe when hes not there
His quirky mannerisim: Being Christian but still fucking you (sorry making love to you) like there is no tomorrow
This quiz by caustic_heart - Taken 10331 Times. </a>
New - How do you get a guy to like you?


it's you there when i close my eyes and you in the morning and you at night. i miss you.Collapse )
3 <3|share your thoughts...

Wednesday, November 17th, 2004

Subject:happy birthday bray.
Time:11:01 pm.
Mood: bored.

it was the day of bray's birthday. we went to ice cream, smoothies and mexi. i bought him a smoothie. and he invited me to dinner.

pe es. when bray and i hang out. it never consits of us hanging out. he just talks on his phone to his lover. muahahah.

pe pe es. nonetheless. happy birthday.

the day of bray + pink ribbonCollapse )

5 <3|share your thoughts...

Monday, November 15th, 2004

Subject:i'm scared of not being with you.
Time:10:57 pm.

just for kicksCollapse )

2 <3|share your thoughts...

Time:10:23 pm.

it's because i listen to the same song over and over.


I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
The needle tears a hold
The old familiar sting
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything

What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

I wear this crown of thorns
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stains of time
The feelings disappear
You are someone else
I am still right here

What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

If I could start again
A million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way


i know what i want but finally it's time for what i need.




please just don't forget.  11/15

Saturday, November 13th, 2004

Subject:c.s. lewis
Time:10:37 pm.
Mood: mellow.

i think when we get those moments where things are just too hard to comprehend, there is a whole different world.Collapse )

15 <3|share your thoughts...

Monday, November 1st, 2004

Time:4:29 pm.
Mood: loved.


i love you. ♥Collapse )

10 <3|share your thoughts...

Sunday, October 31st, 2004

Subject:happy halloween.
Time:4:57 pm.
Mood: horny.
i loved yesterday.


x means yes.Collapse )

4 <3|share your thoughts...

Monday, October 18th, 2004

Time:9:37 pm.
Mood: gloomy.

my shadows the only one that walks beside me.Collapse )

6 <3|share your thoughts...

Wednesday, October 13th, 2004

Time:3:43 pm.
Mood: numb.

sarah, i love you. and i'm soo glad that we got to catch up. it makes me really miss you. <3


yesterday was shitty, that doesn't matter though. because it didn't feel shitty. wierd huh? i've been thinking over and over about one thing that k said to me last night. that we are so different yet the same and when i care about someone i stay close to them because it's what's comfortable. yet he cares and runs away since that's all he's ever known. but, today my latin teacher told me that i should drop latin because i am failing at it. it was sad. oh well.

amanda and i went shopping in berk. this is us at buffalo. we're silly, i think.

do you need to find a lover that's gonna last?Collapse )

6 <3|share your thoughts...

Tuesday, October 5th, 2004

Time:4:50 pm.
Mood: tired.

i havn't updated in a million zillion years. where have i been? last weekend was sasha's birthday!!! hooray. i love the ferry, sas, will you burn me the modest mouse cd? hehe.

i guess i should just post pics. no one ever reads the words anyways. well, we all went to the worst a's game ever and stayed for fireworks (because they are pretty).


 i want her. do you?


 we love our converse.

 carter's ribbon is pretty.

 carter & i.

 am and i...

 A and J

oh, it's not over...Collapse )</p>


12 <3|share your thoughts...

Time:11:55 am.
Mood: nauseated.

texting at four am never makes sense.


k: text me something.

i never want to loose you.

k: i never want to be lost

and do you think you will be lost?

k: no but if i do will i be found

k: just don't stop being you

are u still not sleeping?

k: no i never am



6 <3|share your thoughts...

Friday, September 17th, 2004

Time:4:25 am.


i hope you like saturday, as well. i love you. shh.


2 <3|share your thoughts...

Subject:bah hum bug
Time:5:26 am.
Mood: intimidated.

it's almost five thirty and i havn't slept yet. i already tried. but i can't fall asleep. tomorrow is going to be such a bad day at school i have to be in physics remaking a test i failed in 1 hour and 40 minutes...just kill me now. i hate school. 

nonetheless, this week has been so confusing for me. i really hope that we are all nice and not mean to each other ever. but, everything is slowing fading away. and emotions have been stirred, for you and me, and i hate that. i wish i knew what to do and when to do it. how come i fail at this everytime? how come everything seems to change just when things seem to be all so perfect? don't pull away. not now. not ever.  i can't really do anything about it now. i'm too empty feeling to even attempt at fixing anything right now. let's just see how this weekend goes? i bet i won't see you. oh no. i'm getting nervous. i hate that even more.


i feel as if you are my life. and i wish you could say the same about me...

<3forever until i die.


god. i hate when i am emo. sorry. 

1 <3|share your thoughts...

Thursday, September 16th, 2004

Subject:i liked this one.
Time:12:08 am.
If LJ Was a Bar by Karen_Walker
Dancing Badlyandsoiwaslike
Playing Pooldogydogz
Playing Dartshereigo_again
Singing Karaoker_d_a
Got in with a Fake IDsimpleepitaph
Guy with a Mulletshawnypb
Too Drunk to Standyurizzle
Hitting on Everyonegoobersniffer95
Hot Chick_dannyxboy
Quiz created with MemeGen!

fyi. i hate when i over react.
1 <3|share your thoughts...

Sunday, September 12th, 2004

Subject:saddest text.
Time:1:28 am.

and why do i feel like we are drifting, once again.

12 <3|share your thoughts...

Wednesday, September 8th, 2004

Subject:get caught in the thick black smoke
Time:10:51 pm.





                        with your presence tonight


i get to see him tomorrow. i'm too nervous to be excited.


ange loves me. look.

GOOB ersNIFFer95:
















anyways, this is JING. we hate each other. :)

jliu.Collapse )

3 <3|share your thoughts...

Monday, August 30th, 2004

Subject:JUST SEMI.
Time:10:11 pm.
Mood: thirsty.


i'm semi sick. just semi. after i sleep i feel better and guess what i just took a nap. but who gets sick after the best night of camping when it's a million zillion degrees outside?

i stole this from amanda because she is beautiful.

and ange and i are too!


i got new shoes and i got my ear pierced. plus, i wanted to post pics. LOOK.

robbie's my favorite. ((frisbee in hand. ))



colinm16: i cried
colinm16: because im emo


mario...is my favorite gas station man.


carter and i eat lolipops.

pzzzCollapse )

11 <3|share your thoughts...

Thursday, August 19th, 2004

Subject:BRAY BRAY.
Time:12:49 pm.
Mood: amused.

it's my journal. i can post what i want.

this picture makes me laugh out loud. WHAT A GOONE.

laughter for brandon always.

5 <3|share your thoughts...

Sunday, August 15th, 2004

Subject:hand in hand
Time:10:38 am.
Mood: contemplative.

i've been listening to this song over and over for the past couple of days. don't you like it when you find a song that explains exactly how you feel in that exact moment?

You make me come
You make me complete
You make me completely miserable...



i know and love everything that is and comes with this hand.

13 <3|share your thoughts...

Friday, August 13th, 2004

Subject:in and out slash bowling
Time:7:06 pm.
Mood: dirty.

my swim team and i went to in and out and bowling. i figured i'd post them because i don't know what else to do with them.

sometimes we swim then bowl and then swim some more.Collapse )

4 <3|share your thoughts...

LiveJournal for .steph..

View:User Info.
View:Website (myspace).
You're looking at the latest 25 entries. Missed some entries? Then simply jump back 25 entries.